Losing my motivation.

I'm a little concerned that a little over 4 weeks out, I seem to have lost all my mojo. There are no nesting instincts. I'm not sure that nesting instincts are the same for hoarders as they are for normal people. I'm in no rush to pack my hospital bag when just a few weeks ago I woke up in a panic that I had no idea what to put in it. I was freaking out that my diaper bag wouldn't get here in time but now that it's here, it's just sitting in the room with nothing in it. I feel like it's almost too soon to be getting those final steps ready.

I've been complaining that it must be because I have no nursery furniture. Since I have no where to put clean baby clothes, there's no reason to wash anything. But in reality even if I had everything I probably wouldn't be any further along than I am. Part of me realizes that 4 weeks is not a very long time but the other part of me is convincing the first part not to get things ready too soon. Why do I always listen to the non-intelligent side?

I have an appointment coming up. I guess if the practitioner tells me to get ready, then I'll have to force myself to start. Part of the problem is that all my friends who have had babies on this island in the past 3 months have been overdue by 10 days. I don't think I can spend those 10 days just waiting for him to come out. All I know is that if he comes early or even on time, Shiggy will probably have to run home and do a load of baby laundry so he has clothes to wear and sheets to sleep on.

We had our maternity photo shoot yesterday. When I booked the shoot, it seemed really far away and I found a really good priced photographer so I told myself even if the pictures don't come out, it's not a big deal. The date kind of snuck up on me and right after the shoot, I started freaking out that none of the pictures would come out. She sent me "sneak peaks" of 2 and I think they'll be great...at least I hope so...

I feel so wishy washy these days. Sleeping is getting harder and harder. I sleep exclusively on my back because that's the only way I can get any sleep. At first I was neurotic about never sleeping on my back. Now I'll take what I can get. My ribs ache all the time. I can't imagine them expanding anymore but I know it'll be a couple of weeks yet before he drops. I'm also just all around grumpy because I've been fighting a cold for the last week and refuse to take anything for it.

Those are my random thoughts for the week because cohesive thinking eludes me at this point...

Running out of space....

Everywhere! In my body AND in my house. Why do babies take up so much space? I've been slowly emptying out the office to make it into the nursery. And by slowly I mean I started months ago and I'm about half way done. Every time I take out a box of office supplies, I replace it with a box of baby supplies. Luckily we don't have any nursery furniture to fit in there yet but I realized I'm probably going to have to get it sooner than I had originally anticipated. My brother and my friend Danna have started sending me their little ones' clothes that they've outgrown and there's just no where to put them all. Right now I have them in cardboard boxes, labelled and ready to pull out when the baby will fit in them.

Another item that's taking over the room...diapers. I went crazy during a Babies R Us diaper sales and stocked up on every size and every brand. I'm just hoping the baby doesn't skip sizes or I'm gonna have a lot of extra diapers laying around. Might even have to start a diaper cake business. But now I don't even look at diapers when I go out. Almost makes me consider cloth diapers except for the fact that I deal with poop all day long from the dogs, I don't want to deal with the baby's poop more than the time I take the diaper off of them and throw it in the trash.

The house is slowly coming together, a little slower than the nursery. We're having a post wide garage sale next week and I've never been this excited to get rid of stuff. I'm getting rid of a ton of stuff that I've fought Shiggy to keep over the years but realized that I really don't need and don't have the space for it anymore. So bye bye spare sewing machine, George Foreman grill, food dehydrator, rotisserie, Total Gym, extra TVs and 5 Brita water filters. I can't wait to have space in the storage closet for the office supplies and hopefully my sewing supplies so they aren't just chilling in the kitchen.

I'm also going to restart this blog with my other account. There's very few people that know about and read this blog and I've done that on purpose so that I can say whatever I want without offending people and hurting feelings. Really it was a place for me to vent without repercussions. But soon the focus of my blog will be changing and I know a ton of family members would like to be updated about the baby and the goings on of our new little family. Even without the baby I'm a horrible poster so we'll see how it goes once the baby gets here. Don't worry, I'll let all 3 of you readers know when I finally set up the new page!

6 more weeks to go!